Infinity And Beyond
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Friday, April 18, 2008
I'm probably entering one of the shittiest time of my life at the momment... This feeling sucks BIG TIME!!I just cant stay at home, it will only make my imagination run wild, thats why i decided to go to town (AGAIN!!! 5 times in 5 days) Went to watch Jacky Chan's Fobbiden kingdom... Not bad a show but with my current mood, very thing seems to suck... Totally no mood to do anything, everything i do seems to be so meaningless... Absolutely no more motivation in life... Keeps me wondering how am i suppose to survive... Maybe i cant?! Starting to feel rather useless, just cant seems to do anything right at the momment... Time just ticks by so slowly.... Good things always seems so short, likewise, passing through a bad time seems so long............. I just cant imagine nothing have happen when the fact is there is !! The words u said are so right!!! It's like someone giving me a tight SLAP, knocking me out from my senses.... There is a problem and unlike my character, i dont hide from it, but likewise, i just cant find a solution to it.... Contradicting huh!! Exactly I have been thinking this past 2 days, causing me so many sleepless night, yet feeling so hopeless at the same time.... During this tormented time, no positive thoughts seems to take place... Every thoughts, everything seems so negative... Maybe i'm too emotional!!! Tears were shed, emotion hitting rock bottom... I just so hate the way i'm now!! Guess this trip tp HK is gonna be so different from the previous few, surprisingly, i'm no longer excited on the trip... It serve no purpose to me anymore Now i truely understand the defination of LOVE!! It's not about possesion, her happiness is everything... Leaving is always the hardest thing to do, but think about it as exchanging it for someone's happiness, it's seems all worth while!!! A drug that i cant live without, i'm suffering from the aftermath of not having it now!! Pain stalking and tormenting!!! It's a suffering!!! (For me to actually trust the "fortune teller" thingy will eventually happen, i guess i'm too naive)
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